By Shay
Bilchik, president and CEO, Child Welfare League of America
(ARA) - Combine one part self-confidence, one part open
communication, one part active parenting and one part knowledge, stir them
together and what do you get? The recipe for a secure, well-adjusted child
and the secret to a happy, healthy family.
One of the most important things a parent can do for a
child is to nurture their sense of self worth. When children feel
confident and secure, they’re more likely to succeed in school and be
capable of maintaining personal relationships.
Close,
nurturing relationships with parents, relatives and other caregivers allow
and encourage children and young people to grow and thrive. Caring
relationships with community members, including neighbors, coaches,
teachers and faith community leaders and members, strengthen social
relationship skills, improve self-mastery and enhance self esteem. Good
relationships among children and youth themselves reinforce healthy
behaviors and increase positive learning opportunities.
The way parents interact with their children influences
the type of people they become. Parents’ actions influence the way
children feel about themselves. When parents respect their kids, the
children learn to respect themselves; when parents show affection, kids
learn how to share their feelings with others.
But no one is born knowing how to be a parent -- it is
something we learn as we grow with our children. But there are certain
skills and behaviors that can be taught, and the Child Welfare League of
America (CWLA) helps parents by providing a curriculum for parenting
education to more than 18,000 child care, preschool and Head Start centers
that use these materials to train thousands of parents of young children
in positive parenting techniques. CWLA is working to give parents the
information they need and want to make parenting more enjoyable and more
effective.
Here are some ideas on how you can establish a closer
relationship with your children:
* Learn how children develop and know your unique child.
Although each age and stage of a child’s development has common features,
all children grow in their own way and in their own time. Getting to know
your child will help you be a more effective parent. Don’t be afraid to
combine information available in books, videos and on the Internet with
your own knowledge of your unique child.
* Cherish your child’s individuality. Building
children’s self-confidence and sense of self-worth is critical to their
future development. Contribute to your children’s self-image by enjoying
them just the way they are, not as they could be. Praise and nurture their
unique strengths and personality.
* Talk with and listen to your child. Effective
parent-child communication is the foundation for building your child’s
self-esteem and fostering loving, supportive relationships with others.
Keep communication lines open and listen to what your child says.
* Make time for family activities. A sense of belonging
to a family is enhanced when families take the time to engage in common
activities. Develop family rituals and memories.
* Be creative in preventing and responding to
unacceptable behavior. What works for one child may not work for another.
Respond to your child’s behavior problems in a variety of ways, but always
with love. Each situation may require a different approach.
* Take care of yourself. Take time to pay attention to
your own mental, physical and emotional needs. In the long run, you will
be a better parent.
Forming a good relationship with your child will last a
lifetime. For more information about the Child Welfare League of America,
and for additional positive parenting tips, visit our Web site at
www.cwla.org.
Courtesy of ARA Content