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I love musicals. Musicals are perhaps the greatest entertainment
invention in the known universe. You see, absolutely anything can
happen in a world where people are permitted to burst into song.
Imagine if real life were like this. Think about how wonderful your
world would be if you could sing the “I’m So Miserable in My
Cubicle” song or if you could sing “I Just Met the Hottest Guy In
The World” song – of course you would be afforded the best in
musical accompaniment, dancers and costumes while singing said song.
Really, think about it. You know what would happen if you stood up
at your desk and yelled, “I’m miserable in my cubicle!” You’d be
talking to Human Resources about the wonderful mental health
benefits your company reserves for all associates. If you were to
yell, “I just met the hottest guy in the world” in a bar, you’d hear
him mumble something along the lines of “bunny boiler” as he made a
quick dash for the door.
Somehow, though, musicals make this behavior perfectly acceptable.
“Chicago” is the unlikely story of Roxie, a girl that shoots her
lover when she discovers he can’t make her a star. Her husband does
everything he can to hire Billy Flynn (a lawyer that’s never lost a
case for any of his female clients) to help Roxie beat the wrap. To
top it all off, Roxie is in jail with Velma, an actual star who had
committed a double-murder that same night AND still managed to take
the stage on time. If you have to wonder how this will all pan out
and whether or not there will be bigger-than-life characters, then
you simply don’t know musicals.
In a regular movie, this would all seem contrived and ridiculous.
Set it to song, however, and it becomes something exciting.
Suddenly, “Chicago” is an event and we learn that even the most
ridiculous of events makes sense once the gals sing through
everything. Besides, where else will you get lyrics like “so I fired
two warning shots…right into his head” that you feel perfectly
comfortable singing along to once you buy the soundtrack?
As I write this, “Chicago” has been nominated for quite a few
Oscars. And rightly so. Hollywood used to be all about musicals when
movies were meant to entertain as much as humanly possible. We’ve
come a long way in film and have stretched what film can mean to
many different people. At the same time, though, we’ve seemingly
abandoned the fundamentals. Thanks in part to “South Park” and more
so to “Moulin Rouge,” I think we’re actually seeing the beginning of
the musical resurgence.
For those of you that are married to, dating or are friends with men
that feel seeing musicals are not-so-manly, you have an ace in the
hole. That is the aforementioned “South Park” movie. Rent it one
night. Your husband/boyfriend/friend will watch the film and laugh a
great deal. At the very end, casually say, “that was a great
musical.” It may take a few moments to sink in, but they will
realize that, yes, they’ve really just watched a musical. They will
realize that they’re the same guy they were when they started
watching the film. This is your window of opportunity to mention
wanting to see “Chicago.”
The Usual:
What It’s Worth: Full-fare, this is entertainment! Be sure that you
go all-out on the movie food. That’s popcorn, candy and pop!
Main Reason To See This Film: The musical numbers!
Main Reason Not To See This Film: There is a point at which you feel
just a bit closer to Queen Latifah than you’d prefer.
MPAA Rating: PG-13
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